Broken Bottom

My daughter confronted me with some startling information this morning. Despite bopping around as she usually does and getting her OJ and muffin for breakfast, she said:

"Mom, my butt is broken"

"Whaaaa?"

"Yesterday, I was playing on the playground and jumped up and fell down on the ground with my leg like this (she twists her leg pretzel like in a demostration) and hit the ground hard. I think my butt is broken. I think we need to go get x-rays."

I'm no doctor, but I felt confident in telling her that an x-ray would not be necessary. She then proceeded to quiz me on my bum-related crashes and if I EVER possibly could understand her pain. The underlying message was clear (being subtle is not her strong suit) I did not know the seriousness of the situation, as I have not had substantial bum trauma.

"Mom, I think we need to go get x-rays"

"Uh, no we don't need to get x-rays. You need to get ready for school."

She missed the bus, so I ended up driving her to school with bed-head and in my pink and grey sheep pajamas.

As she hopped out of the car she said in a very accusatory tone, "Do you feel good about dropping me off at school without getting me x-rays to see if my butt is broken?"

After thinking for half a nano-second, I said, "Yes, yes I do feel very good about dropping you off here at school without determining the nature of your butt injury with unnecessary and expensive x-rays."

Glaring at me and letting out a world-weary huff of exasperation- she grabbed her backpack, viola, and in spite of the crushing pain of her severe booty injury, ran to the school doors and up the steps.